Constable Dooley
My blogs
| Location | Lincolnshire, United Kingdom |
|---|---|
| Introduction | It’s a crazy world we live in. Even crazier on the World Wide Web. Just ask self-appointed Internet patrolman Doyle “Dooley” Johns. Born on a remote farm in Lincolnshire — where Missus Buckley lived — Doyle was a dimwitted boy, prone to mispronouncing the spelling of his own first name as "Dooley." The nickname would never leave him, nor did the dim-wittedness. In his teens, Dooley was the bassist for the non-invading British band The Pollywoggs. He later attended the Hendon Police College in London, finishing his training via correspondence after a sustained bout with boils about his buttocks. After a long career as a uniformed foot soldier, Constable Dooley now polices the Albert Gore Memorial Misinformation Superhighway™, raining unholy hell — holy on Sundays — on anyone he sees fit or unfit. Along the way he's earned a reputation for political incorrectness, eloquent factual misfires and flatulence. The son of the late Prudence (Elderberry) Johns and RAF Officer Aldridge “AJ” Johns, Dooley has a brother, Churchwarden Milton Jessup Johns and a sister, Missus Rogers. Johns is married with one son, Tennyson, grandson Winchester and a ball-less dog named Bloomfield. |