Gender	Male
Industry	Publishing
Occupation	Writer
Location	Jersey City, New jersey, United States
Introduction	I was raised by badgers until the age of 7. Then I moved to Cuba to study English... in hindsight, not the best decision ever. From there I became the leading figurehead of the national Cock fighting league. Once again, not the best choice of careers. Now I write here, because it keeps the Federales off my back. For now.

You can punch a hole in an apple using a straw. How do you think that makes your milkshake feel?

Very squishy!