Gender	Male
Occupation	Manager
Location	Portland, Oregon, United States
Introduction	The job of Dean of Faber College is one that necessitates constant vigilance. From fizzies in the swimming pool to delivering cadavers to the alumni dinner, the Delta House is always out to chap my suspenders.
Interests	Politics, Movies, Sci-Fi, Sports (Football)
Favorite movies	The Goonies, Star Wars, The Gold Rush, The Princess Bride, Amelie, Caddyshack, Animal House(of course), Aliens, The Holy Grail, and probably a hundred other films I pretty much love but don't have room to list here.
Favorite music	U2, Bob Marley, Elvis, The Police, The Rolling Stones, B.B. King, Blues, Rock, The Clash, Punk, Classical, Jazz, Hip Hop, The Ramones, Greenday, Cindy Lauper
Favorite books	Patrick O'Neil's Jack Aubrey series, Tolkien,Ortega y Gassett, Lovecraft, World War Z, Any History, Rush Limbaugh is a Big Fat Liar, The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy,

Compose the lyrics to a new national anthem that features an animal sound at least once:

AMOOrica, AMOOrica, God shed his grace on thee. And crowned thy hood with low-fat curd, from sea to shining sea.