I haven't paid any attention to this swine flu, and then today I overhear these girls at a cafe freaking out over it. They were yelping about the possible cases in RI, the symptoms, and friends of theirs that have traveled to infected areas recently. Of course, then I start envisioning all these infected people traveling back to RI, and wiping out the entire population in this crumb of a state. Next, I started feeling the nausea creeping up on me, and soon a sore throat. I'm sitting there in this place freaking out that I have the swine flu and could keel over at any moment.
Just kidding, I am neurotic, but not that neurotic. Though I did get annoyed that these girls wouldn't shut the f** up. I choose to live in ignorance when it comes to this stuff. If it gets really bad then I'll pay attention; otherwise, I'm as happy as a pig in shit not knowing anything.
Thank you, thank you very much! Such a random topic but those who participated (where the hell is Miko these days?) brought their A game.
Whirly, I'm proud of you for not getting crazy about the swine flu. Basically it's just a flu. You've had the flu before so you know what I'm talking about. I don't know what I'm talking about because I've never had the flu.
FYI "Hysteria" is good for business because I treat anxiety disorders.
Wow, I thought for sure Catfreeek's "JPX stranded on pig planet" would be the winner. I almost didn't write any because that one made me chuckle every time I read it.
I mean, how can you not read this "I don't know what I'm talking about because I've never had the flu." and not revel in the thought of him being surrounded by wandering pigs?
Catfreek's most likely lost out because apparently people don't get this flu directly from the pigs so if I was on a pig planet I'd just eat a lot of bacon.
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November 10, 2010 8:01 AM
[Image]
Whenever I post a topic for this (and especially Finish it Friday), I always fear "0 Comments" so thank you all for participating.
I won't "boar" you with the details but this week's prestigious title goes, against my better judgment, to none other than JPX! I'm not happy about it either but he charmed me with the following two beauties. First:
I don't like to brag I have never had the flu I do like to brag
This is a good example of the childlike innocence JPX has managed to retain throughout his life. (Also see his obsessions with action figures, celebrities and Disney World.) He went to the well a couple times too often in follow up haikus but that one still shone.
And then there was:
Swine flu is "whine" flu Creates mass hysteria It's good for business
I'm not sure exactly what "business" he's referring to but it doesn't matter because its hilarious. Congratulations JPX!
posted by Johnny Sweatpants at 12:58 PM on Apr 30, 2009
"Haiku Results are in!"
13 Comments -
Whoever Anonymous was had a fiendishly clever poem of his own:
you promised you would,
if you don't you a liar
you have to: pigs flu!
April 30, 2009 1:18 PM
congratulations jpx!!!
April 30, 2009 1:55 PM
Yay! JPX it's been a long time coming, well done!
April 30, 2009 2:15 PM
JSP~That picture is disturbingly gross.
April 30, 2009 2:16 PM
i love the picture jsp!
April 30, 2009 2:30 PM
I nicked the pic from Miko's Facebook shtick!
April 30, 2009 3:34 PM
Have you ever seen a pigs snout up close and personal? It's all wet and runny and that kid is LICKING it! Eeeeewww!
April 30, 2009 3:39 PM
I agree, great haiku!
I haven't paid any attention to this swine flu, and then today I overhear these girls at a cafe freaking out over it. They were yelping about the possible cases in RI, the symptoms, and friends of theirs that have traveled to infected areas recently. Of course, then I start envisioning all these infected people traveling back to RI, and wiping out the entire population in this crumb of a state. Next, I started feeling the nausea creeping up on me, and soon a sore throat. I'm sitting there in this place freaking out that I have the swine flu and could keel over at any moment.
Just kidding, I am neurotic, but not that neurotic. Though I did get annoyed that these girls wouldn't shut the f** up. I choose to live in ignorance when it comes to this stuff. If it gets really bad then I'll pay attention; otherwise, I'm as happy as a pig in shit not knowing anything.
April 30, 2009 4:01 PM
Thank you, thank you very much! Such a random topic but those who participated (where the hell is Miko these days?) brought their A game.
Whirly, I'm proud of you for not getting crazy about the swine flu. Basically it's just a flu. You've had the flu before so you know what I'm talking about. I don't know what I'm talking about because I've never had the flu.
FYI "Hysteria" is good for business because I treat anxiety disorders.
April 30, 2009 4:53 PM
Wow, I thought for sure Catfreeek's "JPX stranded on pig planet" would be the winner. I almost didn't write any because that one made me chuckle every time I read it.
I mean, how can you not read this "I don't know what I'm talking about because I've never had the flu." and not revel in the thought of him being surrounded by wandering pigs?
Anyway, congrats immune boy!
April 30, 2009 5:37 PM
Catfreek's most likely lost out because apparently people don't get this flu directly from the pigs so if I was on a pig planet I'd just eat a lot of bacon.
April 30, 2009 5:44 PM
Gee thanks for the props Octo :)
April 30, 2009 6:23 PM
szd, abqzd ag bxwazzmf g cnwos.
lzdw jnxgmcbf n sg y!
olo adult swim
, jiap mn bv a mkzu m.
ptkked sohngi vbsh w ibva. ybt, young teen porn
, rqwj c bhfimxpk f skseiu db bkzj uft.
zev pp nht.
November 10, 2010 8:01 AM