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[Image]The freshly fallen snow hides the team of savage rapists within the... Christmas Cottage! Christmas 2007.

From Iwatchstuff, "Thomas Kinkade, Painter of Lightâ„¢, has awed middle-America with his detailed depictions of cottages, bridges, gazebos(!), and other scenery decorated with pleasantly glowing highlights, earning his paintings a secure spot above collections of Precious Moments and Beanie Babies. Now, Lionsgate is hoping capitalize on Kinkade's immense popularity by bringing the lackluster winter scene, Christmas Cottage, to cinemas everywhere (also, above your grandma's couch). Variety mentions the film will be only partially biographic, leaving the remainder to be filled with a plot involving a snowy cabin, a wreath, a soft glow, and the Christian spirit of non-offensive mediocrity."