Steve

About me

Gender Male
Occupation Professional Professional
Location New York City, New York
Introduction Look I'm not going to bullshit you; I'm writing this as I take a shit, okay? I do this because I'm funny and I want you to laugh at the things I write and tell me I'm funny. Feel free to contact me at abazlu@gmail.com with any particular inquiries or offers and I will be sure to respond promptly with blatant hostility and various references to my penis.
Interests Viciously insulting the people I care about on a regular basis, Drinking alone, Getting out of bed past 4pm just to buy liquor, EXISTENTIALISM, Slacking off, Apathy, Being really really good looking
Favorite Movies Star Wars
Favorite Music The Beatles
Favorite Books The Great Gatsby

The love potion you made tastes terrible. How will you drink it?

Why the fuck would I make a love potion for MYSELF? I'd make someone else drink it. If she didn't want it I'd force it down her throat. "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MAKE ME DO!? WHY CAN'T YOU JUST LOVE ME?!"